A lot has been written and spoken in recent times about the whole concept of drama and avoiding drama in our lives. I don’t remember people talking so much about it years ago but it definitely is something that is an issue for us these days. So what is drama then? Well apart from the conventional definitions that relate to dramatic arts and theatre, the drama I’m concerned with is one where a person turns something unimportant into a major deal. Someone who blows things way out of proportion whenever the chance is given. You will know very quickly if someone is addicted to drama because being around them can be quite exhausting and energy draining. A bit of drama can be funny nonetheless as long as it’s not hurting anyone, and in small amounts
Maybe your close friend has as many catastrophes as there are days of the week. Maybe you’re the person everyone calls with their problems. Or maybe you unknowingly turn small issues into major crises and you’d like to stop feeling so overwhelmed. Sometimes this is called ‘catastrophising’ which is an irrational thought a lot of us have in believing that something is far worse than it actually is, or in plainer terms making a mountain out of a molehill! Do you recognise yourself or a person in your life in this, I think we all have the potential to do this but it’s recognising it for what it is that helps to pull it back and see things clearly.
If there’s drama in multiple areas of our lives, we need to be honest with ourselves because we are the constant. Are we creating it? We are responsible for what surrounds us in our lives (for the most part). We don’t do anything repeatedly unless there’s something in it for us, so, what’s the payoff? Sometimes we are looking for attention or excitement. We may have grown up with drama and just feel best when there’s some around you because it’s familiar, it’s all we know. Well if this is so and we want to change it then we firstly have to recognise that we are creating or drawing the drama into our lives. Acknowledging it is the first step. Surrounding or creating drama is draining and can leave you feeling empty.
A lot of the drama takes place in our own heads, and it’s usually because we’re too deeply immersed in a difficult situation to recognise it isn’t as dire as it seems. If you feel yourself getting overwhelmed by a situation, step back and realise this feeling isn’t permanent - nothing is. Then focus on action steps - on the things you can control. What can you do today to proactively create a solution?
If someone repeatedly comes to you with catastrophes, give yourself a window of time when you’ll listen, and then take care of your own needs by walking away. Also, resist the urge to jump into a ‘pity party’ to use an American term. More often than not people calm themselves down when other people don’t validate their complaints. I’m not saying don’t listen to people with a problem by any means as this can be very important, I’m talking more about someone with constant dramas who drains you.
In the times we live in today, energy, especially the positive kind, is a precious commodity. It’s not something you should willingly give up to the negative power of others. Instead, keep a positive attitude and surround yourself with positive people who leave you feeling upbeat and energised.
Contact Glen on 083 1470147 or on Facebook www.facebook.com/glencoach